(Source: lizgillies, via orangeis)

July-26 / 8:00 / 49,933 notes /

(Source: g-4-y)

July-26 / 4:00 / 610 notes /

(Source: missargent, via asherisaliom)

July-25 / 20:00 / 917 notes /


season seven meme

three/five funny scenes • sheldon wants a new gaming system. amy wants butter. hilarity ensues.

(via capkidd)

July-25 / 16:00 / 819 notes /

(Source: rtgeary, via dewogong)

July-25 / 12:00 / 322,627 notes /



Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?

Officer: Ma’am, you were speeding.

Woman: Oh, I see.

Officer: Can I see your license please?

Woman: I’d give it to you but I don’t have one.

Officer: Don’t have one?

Woman: Lost it 4 times for drunk driving.

Officer: I see…Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.

Woman: I can’t do that.

Officer: Why not?

Woman: I stole this car.

Officer: Stole it?

Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.

Officer: You what?

Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see.

The Officer looks at the woman, slowly backs away to his car, and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.

Officer 2: Ma’am, could you step out of your vehicle

The woman steps out of her vehicle.

Woman: Is there a problem sir?

Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.

Woman: Murdered the owner?

Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.

The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.

Officer 2: Is this your car, ma’am?

Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers.

The first officer is stunned.

Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license.

The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer. The officer snaps open the clutch purse and examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.

Officer 2: Thank you ma’am, one of my officers told me you didn’t have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.

Woman: Betcha the lying bastard told you I was speeding too.

that was a wild ride

(via asherisaliom)

July-25 / 8:00 / 441,108 notes /

(Source: epicallyfunny, via thefrogman)

July-25 / 4:00 / 67,699 notes /

"I’ve nowhere to go. My kingdom is long dead. Long dead.”

(Source: morgainependragon, via fuckyeahjosswhedon)

July-24 / 20:00 / 586 notes /

"Why are they both white?"
"That’s what my friend Keisha asked about you and Daddy."

(Source: invisiblechange, via philnotfeel)

July-24 / 16:00 / 853 notes /


Cathedral Cove, Coromandel Peninsula, New Zealand | image by Kyle Carter

July-24 / 12:00 / 410 notes /

(Source: syntheticimagination, via dewogong)

July-24 / 4:00 / 36,374 notes /

favorite characters

↳ Anya Jenkins (Buffy The Vampire Slayer)

(via fuckyeahjosswhedon)

July-23 / 20:01 / 2,487 notes /


I laugh every single time.

(Source: pinkmanjesse, via nothingcanstopthejuggernaut)

July-23 / 16:00 / 501,303 notes /

Ohana means family. Family means nobody gets left behind, or forgotten.

(Source: ohanawaii, via hilfehilfe)

July-23 / 12:00 / 34,293 notes /